Personal Log 005 - Farewells

We are withdrawing from Oasis. It has been an excellent learning experience, and as of now I can not say that I regret it. My only real wish would be to continue to stay, to colonize this place in the name of the Nomad Church. That of course would be contrary to our beliefs, and as such we will move on with the rest of those of Stillwater who have joined us here.


It is still hard for us. The Chief Engineer of the Maranatha has stated that he would prefer to have her serviced, with all of the anomalous system activations that have occurred. The Morocco has had similar anomalous system activations, notably in the engines and attitude adjustment thrusters.


Morale is subdued, but still high. I caught a few of the Sisters saying prayers on one of the observation decks.  They smiled as they prayed, and after it was over they stood there, staring out at the sun, the planet, the moon. They smiled. Not the semi-forced smile that was common among the Sisters of the Nomad Church, but true smiles. I think, in the end, this was a greater lesson for them to learn than I could ever have taught them. Perhaps a lesson for myself as well.


As they began to relax, I spoke. "Do not see this as an end, Sisters. See it as a point on a continuum, from which we have learned something of Creation, and now must move on." They turned, and one of them wiped tears from her eyes.


So, with a heavy heart, preparations for moving on are being made. The Morocco's crew will be far easier to move back to Empire. They were a newer crew, and did not quite understand what they had signed on for. Stillwater had supplied the vessel, but it was a rushed assignment for most of the crewmen.


Personal


I cried. I cried for the first time... since I can remember. I don't know why, or even how... they said I wouldn't. The Voice was not there either, and it has not been back. I feel alone, like I have been abandoned. This place... this place called to me once. I found it, in Penirgman. Then Stillwater found it, and brought me back. The next time I am here... the next time, I know it will be the last.
This will be my Place of Rest.

Personal Log Entry 004: Situation Report

Situation reports. For some reason I'm missing those now. It's been a while since I had to file one, and to be honest I'd hoped they'd forgotten about me. As they say, if wishes were Fedos.

So, I wrote it. Had to, really. I debated handing in my resignation to the Protocol Foundation, but they're funding my private research so that's not possible. I wonder sometimes if it was the right decision turning to them, but I have the leverage in this situation. They need my research, and without their funding they won't see it.

Stillwater Corporation

I'm still working with them. I'm surprised I've lasted so long, but it's mostly the people. Everyone seems to welcome me with as much optimism for my future as they have questions about my past, which I find healthy. Proving myself seems to be the best motivator I have.

Nomad Church

Most of the sect has stayed at my previous location. Current situation is unchanged, and those who followed are in high spirits. A couple days of boredom boiled over into a small brawl in the Seiryu Maru's mess hall, but it was quickly handled. It seems one of the newer Thukker converts had an issue with one of our Kameira, and decided to show her dissatisfaction by force. The convert was quickly transferred to one of the Thukker vessels stationed here.

Personal

Had an interesting encounter in the Waterdrop last night. A suspicious individual was in there for a while, and I ended up talking to him. He... seems to know more about me than he lets on. I'm wondering why he was there, though his interest seemed rather personal. He spoke of learning... though I think it more likely he studied my public records and knew what buttons to push. Poor Cha ended up being my scapegoat... I think I confused the poor girl, but I needed to deflect his attentions.

Personal Log Entry 003: Fallout

Personal- An eventful day. Found my first wormhole (though it was far from exciting), and the corporation's POS was attacked. Without going into details here, it was interesting. Wasn't able to assist due to prior engagements. Again, unable to go into details.

Decided not to race today. Too much on my mind, and other projects took precedence.

Security has been tightened. Ship's systems are now more under my control, as my crews are all implanted with Ultra Happy Chips. Secondary protocols have been enacted. The two Naqam researchers working on [ENCRYPTED-Please request further information in person. -NR] have been detained by my personal security detachment pending travel arrangements. This is a serious blow to the project.

Project Daedalus is still proceeding however. With the acquisition of [ENCRYPTED-Please request further information in person. -NR], there is still a high chance of success. Still behind schedule and requiring further funding, but should not be a problem to catch up.

Stillwater Corporation- Today, I focused on what that means. Who are they, and what is my place in it? Are they Thukker, Angels, something else? They are more than the sum of their parts. I am here... I am not Thukker nor Angel, perhaps not even considered human by some. At one time I counted myself amongst the Sansha Nation loyalists, but I know now that I could never again walk that path. They are as deluded as any others, perhaps more so as they claim to follow a more enlightened path. No details will be discussed here, but I think this nothing more than a smokescreen. I am, however, part of Stillwater. So I must endeavor to find my place amongst them.

The Church- Continued to discuss with others the direction of our sect. Agreed that it is perhaps best to forge a new path, but one based on the Nomad Church's core concepts.