Personal- An eventful day. Found my first wormhole (though it was far from exciting), and the corporation's POS was attacked. Without going into details here, it was interesting. Wasn't able to assist due to prior engagements. Again, unable to go into details.
Decided not to race today. Too much on my mind, and other projects took precedence.
Security has been tightened. Ship's systems are now more under my control, as my crews are all implanted with Ultra Happy Chips. Secondary protocols have been enacted. The two Naqam researchers working on [ENCRYPTED-Please request further information in person. -NR] have been detained by my personal security detachment pending travel arrangements. This is a serious blow to the project.
Project Daedalus is still proceeding however. With the acquisition of [ENCRYPTED-Please request further information in person. -NR], there is still a high chance of success. Still behind schedule and requiring further funding, but should not be a problem to catch up.
Stillwater Corporation- Today, I focused on what that means. Who are they, and what is my place in it? Are they Thukker, Angels, something else? They are more than the sum of their parts. I am here... I am not Thukker nor Angel, perhaps not even considered human by some. At one time I counted myself amongst the Sansha Nation loyalists, but I know now that I could never again walk that path. They are as deluded as any others, perhaps more so as they claim to follow a more enlightened path. No details will be discussed here, but I think this nothing more than a smokescreen. I am, however, part of Stillwater. So I must endeavor to find my place amongst them.
The Church- Continued to discuss with others the direction of our sect. Agreed that it is perhaps best to forge a new path, but one based on the Nomad Church's core concepts.
Showing posts with label Naqam. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Naqam. Show all posts
Monday, April 6, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Personal Log Entry 001: Changes of Direction
An old professor from SaTI said, "in quantum physics there's no such thing as a change of direction." He was a fool, of course... but as I look upon the past months I have to wonder. Have I truly changed direction, or am I merely going where I was always going?
I know, not exactly the deepest of thoughts.
Please, don't stop reading. There's a point to it.
I was reading IGS today. Specifically a post from Natalcya Katla. I remember speaking with her some months ago, before she joined Naqam. Not going into specifics, she seems to have taken what I said to heart. I wonder if she really believes all that she states, or if she simply clinging to what she thinks will give her the greatest opportunity of seeing her vision. I guess that little experiment can be deemed a success, more or less. One obstacle removed.
I wish I didn't feel so dirty though.
Her vision... it's flawed. She does not see the illogical aspects of her argument. She does not see the irrelevance of it all, really. She is as dead as the Nation itself; inside and out. Once I thought her to be a potential beacon of what we needed. Now she is as much a mockery of the Dream as the True Slaves.
My second project seems to have been a success as well. I've decided to go another direction, but it looks as though using indirect means is more effective. I have forwarded my findings to the Nomad Church; the small number of followers that left with me that is.
On a personal note... I've left all semblence of what I knew. My allies are now Angels and Thukkers, Cartel scientists and Tribal enforcers. An odd mix, but I feel at home. They seem to tolerate my presence, and do not care about my past. Odd, considering I was once part of Naqam.
I have also landed in the same situation as the one who I think truly sees; Casiella Truza. I have not spoken to her at length... not at all, in fact. I wonder what my hesitation is caused by. The Voice says it is simply hierarchical issues. I do not know where she stands on the food chain so I do not wish to become prey, or open myself up to injury. Silly, silly thing that Voice is.
The... headaches are getting worse as well. Mother said they would, but I really didn't believe it until today. Sat in my quarters looking at a holo recording of... well, I won't say the name. If this is hacked I don't want that embarassing comment getting out. Finally on that person's side, and I haven't talked to this person either.
I know, not exactly the deepest of thoughts.
Please, don't stop reading. There's a point to it.
I was reading IGS today. Specifically a post from Natalcya Katla. I remember speaking with her some months ago, before she joined Naqam. Not going into specifics, she seems to have taken what I said to heart. I wonder if she really believes all that she states, or if she simply clinging to what she thinks will give her the greatest opportunity of seeing her vision. I guess that little experiment can be deemed a success, more or less. One obstacle removed.
I wish I didn't feel so dirty though.
Her vision... it's flawed. She does not see the illogical aspects of her argument. She does not see the irrelevance of it all, really. She is as dead as the Nation itself; inside and out. Once I thought her to be a potential beacon of what we needed. Now she is as much a mockery of the Dream as the True Slaves.
My second project seems to have been a success as well. I've decided to go another direction, but it looks as though using indirect means is more effective. I have forwarded my findings to the Nomad Church; the small number of followers that left with me that is.
On a personal note... I've left all semblence of what I knew. My allies are now Angels and Thukkers, Cartel scientists and Tribal enforcers. An odd mix, but I feel at home. They seem to tolerate my presence, and do not care about my past. Odd, considering I was once part of Naqam.
I have also landed in the same situation as the one who I think truly sees; Casiella Truza. I have not spoken to her at length... not at all, in fact. I wonder what my hesitation is caused by. The Voice says it is simply hierarchical issues. I do not know where she stands on the food chain so I do not wish to become prey, or open myself up to injury. Silly, silly thing that Voice is.
The... headaches are getting worse as well. Mother said they would, but I really didn't believe it until today. Sat in my quarters looking at a holo recording of... well, I won't say the name. If this is hacked I don't want that embarassing comment getting out. Finally on that person's side, and I haven't talked to this person either.
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